Saturday, December 19, 2009

My theory on holiday shopping

So it's countdown time, the week before X-Mas when retial shops are on full alert. Shoppers rush into stores, find things last minute, and it is BUSY. Sex shops are no exeption to this rule.

Yet, I have a theory about why the week before holidays is the busiest. A family will rush to buy kids toys first, assuming their are kids to buy toys for. These presents are bought ahead of time, because stores run out of the latest Barbie or
Pokemon or whatever. Then the last week before holidays is personal time, where couples will buy intimate things for each other because they have the basic presents done and now its personal time.

This explains why we have had so many couples come in, and why couple toys like the We Vibe 2 are flying off the shelves. We sold five yesterday, which is pretty impressive for a sex toy that costs around a hundred bucks.

Also porn is flying off the shelves. But specifically couples porn. Like Pirates, the epic most expensice porn ever made. Actually the sequel, Pirates 2 is selling more. But that's probably because I'm biased and recommend it becuase it has my favorite porn star Belladonna in it.

Friday, December 18, 2009

Recharge your sex

Rechargeable vibes are the big thing of '09, and they continue to become even more popular as the year comes to a close. I'm a HUGE fan of rechargeable vibes. Not only are they eco friendly by saving you on batteries, but they last must longer than a battery powered toy and are waaaay quieter. Nothing can kill a moment more than the jackhammering buzz of a vibe that wakes your housemate and the family that lives below you.....but I digress.

The Lelo company keeps coming out with the coolest and sexiest rechargeable vibes that I have seen. And as it was pointed out to me earlier by my friend Drew, I see more sex toys in a day than he will see in his lifetime. Anyways, Lelo products. Every time they come out with a new one I get all giddy because I know someone out there is going to find the toy of their fantasies.

Today we got a new member to our Lelo collection of toys. Ina. Ina is a double stimulation vibrator (like the ever so famous Rabbit Habit by Vixen) but is rechargeable with various pulsations.

Ha! Update! I was just told by my boss that Lelo is now coming out with a multiple speed cock ring that's rechargeable that will be called Thor. Sorry Bo (the current rechargeable cock ring by Lelo).

My only problem with the company is the slight genderization of the names and colors of the products. Their rechargeable anal vibe for example is called Billy and comes in blue. Which gender is that supposed to appeal to? And the vibrators mainly come in light pink or dark pink are called Mia, Gigi, Ina, and other slightly girly names. I mean, common, their coming out with a cock ring called Thor? Might as well call it Hercules or Muscle Manly Man-Man-Man.

But besides that the company is amazing, and is really progressive with making rechargeable toys meant for the cock, ass, and whoo whoo. No hole shall be ignored.

What's next, rechargable vibrating nipple clamps?

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

My day so far

Rearranged erotica. Wasn't aware we carried Lesban Cowboy erotica. Awesome.

Found a broken vibe. :( People need to be more careful when handling products! A dead vibe makes me die a little inside. But no worries, I'll just recycle it! My artist frends like to take dead vibrators from my work and use them in things. Last time I believe a rabbit vibe was used as plumage on a hat (I wore it for a fashion show).

Woman buying the NEW We-Vibe 2. Yes!!! Multispeeds and simpilar control button. Oh and cheaper.

Two guys coming in, looking at masturbations sleeves making jokes and then walking out. You guys are sooo cool.

Older gentelmen looking for flavored condoms. He buys a handful and asks how long the flavor will last. And then buys a cockpump.

So far, pretty good day

Saturday, December 12, 2009


I love our regular customers. The repeat offenders. The ones that I can predict their purchase before they approach the counter. It's a really great feeling learning about someone through sex toy purchases. And since we're in such an intimate setting, regulars become part of our little family.

A woman comes in once a month to buy half a dozen "personal wipes" in mango scent. She sometimes is accompanied by a man named "Blue" who is a magician and sometimes does tricks for me while she walks around (even though she always buys the same thing)

A one eyed woman comes in to try on our corsets, but never buys them. I always feel bad that we don't have ones big enough for her, but still help her squeeze herself into them.

Gentleman who buys a lot of porn. And always wants it in an unmarked bag.

Pro-doms who sends their slaves and submissives in to buy them things.

Masturbation man who buys something new to jack off into every few weeks.

These people have become my family and friends. My observations and my judgements. Thank you shoppers, thank you regulars.