Stealing from a sex shop

So lately theft has been at an all time high at the shop. Maybe its the economy, maybe it's the after holiday blues. Maybe people are just assholes.

So this week I come into work and my boss is freaking out. Someone stole two $125 high quality vibrators right off the shelf. She didn't even see it happen, they just disappeared. Also, this week four bottles of lubricant have disappeared as well. Now I know people steal, it is not uncommon for a cock ring or some small vibrator to go missing. On our first day open three years ago I caught a guy trying to shop lift and asked him to leave. A year later he came in and tried to steal a vibrator again, and one of the employees chased him down. But ever since then the shoplifting has been pretty minute.

I got a big lecture about how we need to watch people in the store. No more dicking around on the computer while customers browse. We need to go out on the floor and watch customers shop.

So my Sunday shift I did just that. Watched people more, made sure I knew where people were looking. Honestly, I felt a little creepy. Apparently I didn't do such a good job, because suddenly a $85 vibrator was missing. Seriously? What the hell people? I was furious, I still am. Stealing from one of the few sex positive, queer friendly, family owned, local sex shops is just messed up. We don't have the money to replace everything that gets stolen, we are barely staying open.

I swear if I catch someone stealing from our shop, I will beat them with a dildo and put furry handcuffs and a ball gag on them and walk them over to the police shop myself.