Things that you (the customer) do that annoy me (the sex shop worker):
-You open packages and pull out the items. Seriously, why? I understand the need to see the product before buying it, which is why we have display items for that very reason, so that you can hold and touch them. Therefore, the need to open packages is eliminated. But no, you continue to open things, even after I ask you not to. How would you feel if someone put their dirty hands all over your vibrator? It's not fair to whoever is going to buy it after you've touched it.
-You try to return porn after I have explained that we have a no return policy on porn We say it when you purchase the porn, it is stated on your receipt, and I am telling you again. There is a no return policy on porn. I'm sorry if it wasn't to your standards, or you didn't like the plot, but we cannot take back your porn.
-You demand to speak to the owner when you don't like what you hear Maybe I told you we have a no return policy, maybe I said that a class you wanted to attend is full. Whatever the issue, you demand to speak with my boss, who by the way will tell you the EXACT same thing. Perhaps you feel superior asking for my supervisor, maybe it makes you feel better. It's annoying, and you will hear the exact same thing I just said.
-You are being vague and secretive about what you are asking me about I get that sex can be scary and embarrassing. I get it. That is why I am here, to help you figure out what will be best for you. So please be blunt, and not vague. Referring to "something" for women doesn't really help me. Did you mean lingerie? A book? A dildo? Throw me a bone please and not make this a guessing game.
-You attempt to make me uncomfortable This happens more than you think. Maybe you are nervous so you want to make your date laugh, or you are really uncomfortable and want me at your level. For whatever reason, stop trying to make me uncomfortable with your crude jokes, inappropriate question, and flirtatious gestures. Yes, I do see you with a dildo at your crotch, waving it at me while your girlfriend/buddy laughs. I will smile politely, but inside I am shoving that thing up your ass while you cry.
-You don't put things back in their proper place We have pillows for you to put display items on. Everything is labeled. So why do I need to go searching for items every time you come in? It causes me to panic because I assume if it's not in it's proper place, it's been shop lifted.
-You leave vibrators on Probably my biggest pet peeve. You turn on toys, and then walk away. Maybe you forgot, or maybe you are just an ass. These things are shaking and moving, and they weren't before, so make them stop. It is also very damaging to the toy if it falls off the shelf due to it being left on. The battery also dies out. It is really simple, turn off toys after you have turned them on. If perhaps you can't figure out how to turn it off, ask me! It is not embarrassing, it happens!