This is a college town. As much as the locals hate to admit it, the university here is pretty dominate. School started this week, and it is definitly noticable. Young groups of adults wandering around big eyed, trying to find their way to a bookstore or coffee shop. New friends grasping for life to each other so that they survive their year.
The store is slightly effected as well. We get more "drifters", youth who wander in giggling and poking at everything and then leave quickly. When I was a student I gave sex tours. I took groups of students around the town and taught them about safe sex and took them to local sex shops and health stores. I also took them to the on-campus health center. They became pretty popular, and after I graduated, one of the girls in my original tour took over. I wonder if they are going to do it this year. It's extremely important to inform students about their resources for sexual topics, be it health or recreational.
We give a 10% student discount that I had started when I was a student. The students appreciate it, and it gets the word out about our store. But honestly, students are not our most common customer. They also don't spend that much money. Twenty bucks at the most.
Oh well, hopefully they are getting their first orgasms out of them.
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Shoplifting Sex
As much as I'd love to say we've never been shoplifted, it would be a dirty lie. Though it is not a common event, things do tend to disappear every once in a while. This morning I came into work and noticed that a few of the display items on the shelves were missing. Small clit vibrators mostly, but it was still irritating.
Two years ago, at our grand opening party I caught an older man putting vibrators in his bag. I stopped him and told him to pay for them or get out. He did end up buying all of them, around $60 worth of product. The same man came back a year later and walked out of the store with a Hitachi Magic Wand. I wasn't there, but the store owner actually chased him down the street and took it back after threatening him with cops.
I have only once chased someone down, but that was because she walked out of the store with an expensive item that didn't ring up properly. She told me that she was hopping I didn't notice.
In general, I hate watching customers every move. I find it a little creepy. My trick is to do work on the computer, and occasionally glance at them. But if there is more than 6 people in the shop, I do walk around and watch. Our shop may be small, but vibrators are smaller.
Sometimes I joke with customers that if I ever get robbed or catch someone shoplifting I am going to chase them down with the Njoy 11, our 3 pound aluminum dildo.
Yeah, you would not want to steal from someone wielding one of these babies.
Two years ago, at our grand opening party I caught an older man putting vibrators in his bag. I stopped him and told him to pay for them or get out. He did end up buying all of them, around $60 worth of product. The same man came back a year later and walked out of the store with a Hitachi Magic Wand. I wasn't there, but the store owner actually chased him down the street and took it back after threatening him with cops.
I have only once chased someone down, but that was because she walked out of the store with an expensive item that didn't ring up properly. She told me that she was hopping I didn't notice.
In general, I hate watching customers every move. I find it a little creepy. My trick is to do work on the computer, and occasionally glance at them. But if there is more than 6 people in the shop, I do walk around and watch. Our shop may be small, but vibrators are smaller.
Sometimes I joke with customers that if I ever get robbed or catch someone shoplifting I am going to chase them down with the Njoy 11, our 3 pound aluminum dildo.
Yeah, you would not want to steal from someone wielding one of these babies.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Awkward Telephone
Calls have been coming in all day. Some have been really awkward to the point that I can't tell if they are a joke.
My responses are in parenthesis
"Do you carry dildos? (yes, we have a large variety.)I am gay and want toys. Do you have gay toys? (We carry a large assortment to toys, you can check out our website if you want to look at the selection.) How far away are you from LA? (8 hours. You can order off of our website) That's okay, I'll drive there." *Hangs up*
"Do you carry men's toys? (Yes, is there anything specific you are looking for?) Do you have blow up dolls? (No) Do you have things that look like porn stars vaginas? (No, we do carry the fleshlight that looks like a vagina, but not anyone specific) But it looks like a vagina? (yes, there is a picture on our website if you want to see it.) Is it under anal toys? (No, it is under penis pleasures) But it looks like a vagina? (yes) Do you carry a variety of vaginas? (no, just the one kind) Does anyone else carry vaginas? (yes, this store *gives address*) Okay *Hangs up*
My responses are in parenthesis
"Do you carry dildos? (yes, we have a large variety.)I am gay and want toys. Do you have gay toys? (We carry a large assortment to toys, you can check out our website if you want to look at the selection.) How far away are you from LA? (8 hours. You can order off of our website) That's okay, I'll drive there." *Hangs up*
"Do you carry men's toys? (Yes, is there anything specific you are looking for?) Do you have blow up dolls? (No) Do you have things that look like porn stars vaginas? (No, we do carry the fleshlight that looks like a vagina, but not anyone specific) But it looks like a vagina? (yes, there is a picture on our website if you want to see it.) Is it under anal toys? (No, it is under penis pleasures) But it looks like a vagina? (yes) Do you carry a variety of vaginas? (no, just the one kind) Does anyone else carry vaginas? (yes, this store *gives address*) Okay *Hangs up*
Oohpah!
Apologies for the lack on entries. I decided to take a needed vacation and go to Burning Man this year.
Being away from the store for at least two weeks is pretty odd. I start to miss the shop and my interactions with people. I begin to have dreams about work, usually involving me being late to shifts or giant changes in the store that leave me panicking or confused.
My first weekend back has been pretty full. There is a local Greek festival happening right outside the shop. The smell of fresh gyros waif in as well as people tipsy off ouzo. Working during the festival is one of my favorite pastimes. There is a large surge of people coming in to check out the store, in addition to live music and snacks that my friends dropping by give me. (says while eating tzatziki sauce and pita bread)
And of course, there is more unique interactions:
-Dozens of couples coming for the first time walking around the store together. Most do not buy anything, but it's pretty frickin cute to watch.
-Three women (on separate occasions) telling me this is their first time in the store because they have been too scared to come in and the festival give them a excuse to drop by
-Drunk guys pulling their embarrassed friends into the store so that they can make an ass of themselves. Examples: Loudly remarking on masturbation sleeves, paddling their friends, buying penis shaped candy for girlfriends. Thankfully I did not have to ask anyone to leave (last year there was an incident with drunks throwing dildos across the room at each other). Did get one girl storm out in embarrassment when her friend started talking about "pussy" very loud.
-Awkward drunk guy came in to ask if we we're Greek and started telling me about how the police we're after him for bugging people at the festival. He ate a gyro sloppily over the counter and I had to clean the juices he dropped after he left.
-Man who worked at the festival (think he was a food vendor)came in to ask politely if the event helped or hindered our business. I explained to him that usually it helped, but since this year for some reason there is booth blocking the view of our store from the street, it isn't that great. There are still people coming in, but not as many as we'd like. He then asked for mint flavored condoms.
-Man came in and bought an anal plug and asked for us to hold it for him so he could walk around the festival without our store bag.
Well, let's see how Sunday works out.
Also, if you have any questions that you want me to answer please email me at avianswers@gmail.com. I'd love to hear from you!
Being away from the store for at least two weeks is pretty odd. I start to miss the shop and my interactions with people. I begin to have dreams about work, usually involving me being late to shifts or giant changes in the store that leave me panicking or confused.
My first weekend back has been pretty full. There is a local Greek festival happening right outside the shop. The smell of fresh gyros waif in as well as people tipsy off ouzo. Working during the festival is one of my favorite pastimes. There is a large surge of people coming in to check out the store, in addition to live music and snacks that my friends dropping by give me. (says while eating tzatziki sauce and pita bread)
And of course, there is more unique interactions:
-Dozens of couples coming for the first time walking around the store together. Most do not buy anything, but it's pretty frickin cute to watch.
-Three women (on separate occasions) telling me this is their first time in the store because they have been too scared to come in and the festival give them a excuse to drop by
-Drunk guys pulling their embarrassed friends into the store so that they can make an ass of themselves. Examples: Loudly remarking on masturbation sleeves, paddling their friends, buying penis shaped candy for girlfriends. Thankfully I did not have to ask anyone to leave (last year there was an incident with drunks throwing dildos across the room at each other). Did get one girl storm out in embarrassment when her friend started talking about "pussy" very loud.
-Awkward drunk guy came in to ask if we we're Greek and started telling me about how the police we're after him for bugging people at the festival. He ate a gyro sloppily over the counter and I had to clean the juices he dropped after he left.
-Man who worked at the festival (think he was a food vendor)came in to ask politely if the event helped or hindered our business. I explained to him that usually it helped, but since this year for some reason there is booth blocking the view of our store from the street, it isn't that great. There are still people coming in, but not as many as we'd like. He then asked for mint flavored condoms.
-Man came in and bought an anal plug and asked for us to hold it for him so he could walk around the festival without our store bag.
Well, let's see how Sunday works out.
Also, if you have any questions that you want me to answer please email me at avianswers@gmail.com. I'd love to hear from you!
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Busiest Day EVER!!!
Today has been busy
oof
Three young girls going to Burning Man all buying and trying on corsets. They leave our racks empty. I don't think they are aware the Burning Man is all dusty and their pretty new outfits are going to get dirty.
Woman comes in for the first time to sign up for our email list. She is friends with Tantra instructors Charles and Leah Muir, who teach classes regularly at the shop.
Young male comes in asking if he can trade quarters for five one dollar bills
Female couple with a puppy named "Dorthy" ask if it's okay to bring her in. Sure, we're pet friendly.
Woman tells me she is going to Burning Man for the first time. She is opening every package she touches. When I ask her not to, she gets defensive. She breaks a vibrators packaging and pretends it "came that way". Fortunately the toy is not broken and I can repackage it. I just hate liars.
Man with a cane asks for the owner by the wrong name. When I explain that she is on vacation in Israel, he says "funny, she doesn't look Jewish, but I'm Mormon so whatever". He buys lube after asking on the price of some Japanese Bondage Instruction books.
Young couple uses a 50% off coupon to buy a vibrator. They are both tiny and adorable.
Friend of mine comes in and buys vibrating anal beads. It makes me happy that my friends are okay with my knowing about their sexual acts.
Couple looking at cock rings and masturbation sleeves. She exclaims "no, don't put your finger in there!" and makes other customers laugh. They start whipping each other and other customers start giggling and shout at them to get a room.
Two middle age women come in to find their g-spots. They say they have been searching but can't find them. They make two piles of sex toys on the counter. Matching vibrators, cock rings, and lube. They demand mink tickler toys from the back storage room because they don't want any that have been "used". They ask a lot of questions about the g-spot and have me write down information.
Couple comes in and buys the We-vibe 2. She tells me that her ex husband was a prude.
Young guy walks around the store with porn in hand. Is nervous when I ask him if he's finding everything okay. He comes to the counter with porn and a penis pump. As I ring him up, he gets a phone call. All of the sudden he is loud and proud. "Yo bro, I'm buying a fuckin dick pump." I try to suppress my giggling as he continues his banter about his purchase.
Guy with bleach blond hair with black spots (weird) comes in and start flogging his arm.
Giggling girls drink Frappichinos while talking about their sex experiences. Just said "I thought it was a Jewish thing?". I wonder what the hell they are talking about. Oh circumcision. Weird hair guy is explaining circumcision to them. I jump in, representing my Jewish culture. Now I think he is creeping them out talking about infection and torture. He is standing awkwardly while they talk. He asks if they've been with a man who is uncircumcised. The girl he asks says "my husband isn't." They make an excuse about needing more coffee and walk quickly off.
Really young couple looks at condoms. It's adorable.
This is probably the busiest I have ever seen this store outside of holiday season.
And there's three more hours of my shift.
Oof.
oof
Three young girls going to Burning Man all buying and trying on corsets. They leave our racks empty. I don't think they are aware the Burning Man is all dusty and their pretty new outfits are going to get dirty.
Woman comes in for the first time to sign up for our email list. She is friends with Tantra instructors Charles and Leah Muir, who teach classes regularly at the shop.
Young male comes in asking if he can trade quarters for five one dollar bills
Female couple with a puppy named "Dorthy" ask if it's okay to bring her in. Sure, we're pet friendly.
Woman tells me she is going to Burning Man for the first time. She is opening every package she touches. When I ask her not to, she gets defensive. She breaks a vibrators packaging and pretends it "came that way". Fortunately the toy is not broken and I can repackage it. I just hate liars.
Man with a cane asks for the owner by the wrong name. When I explain that she is on vacation in Israel, he says "funny, she doesn't look Jewish, but I'm Mormon so whatever". He buys lube after asking on the price of some Japanese Bondage Instruction books.
Young couple uses a 50% off coupon to buy a vibrator. They are both tiny and adorable.
Friend of mine comes in and buys vibrating anal beads. It makes me happy that my friends are okay with my knowing about their sexual acts.
Couple looking at cock rings and masturbation sleeves. She exclaims "no, don't put your finger in there!" and makes other customers laugh. They start whipping each other and other customers start giggling and shout at them to get a room.
Two middle age women come in to find their g-spots. They say they have been searching but can't find them. They make two piles of sex toys on the counter. Matching vibrators, cock rings, and lube. They demand mink tickler toys from the back storage room because they don't want any that have been "used". They ask a lot of questions about the g-spot and have me write down information.
Couple comes in and buys the We-vibe 2. She tells me that her ex husband was a prude.
Young guy walks around the store with porn in hand. Is nervous when I ask him if he's finding everything okay. He comes to the counter with porn and a penis pump. As I ring him up, he gets a phone call. All of the sudden he is loud and proud. "Yo bro, I'm buying a fuckin dick pump." I try to suppress my giggling as he continues his banter about his purchase.
Guy with bleach blond hair with black spots (weird) comes in and start flogging his arm.
Giggling girls drink Frappichinos while talking about their sex experiences. Just said "I thought it was a Jewish thing?". I wonder what the hell they are talking about. Oh circumcision. Weird hair guy is explaining circumcision to them. I jump in, representing my Jewish culture. Now I think he is creeping them out talking about infection and torture. He is standing awkwardly while they talk. He asks if they've been with a man who is uncircumcised. The girl he asks says "my husband isn't." They make an excuse about needing more coffee and walk quickly off.
Really young couple looks at condoms. It's adorable.
This is probably the busiest I have ever seen this store outside of holiday season.
And there's three more hours of my shift.
Oof.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
*sigh*
Tonight has been one of those nights.
Guy in his forties walks around the shop after testing out silicone lube and touches almost every product. Thankfully he actually bought something, or I'd be pissed. His items were slippery as I put them in his bag. He then asked if we had any unmarked bag since one with our store logo was embarrassing.
Group of young 20 year olds run around the store as if it were Disneyland. They play and throw things around, causing a mess and don't purchase a thing.
Shabby looking old man walks in with a walking stick. Creeps other customers out.
Gentlemen walks in and has me describe every massage oil we carry. Didn't understand when I calmly explained multiple times that oil will stain sheets. He then opened every bottle to smell it and announced loudly what each smelled like. He left without buying anything, saying maybe he'd come back after coffee.
Woman walks in to complain about our advertisement outside (poster of a pin up girl). She proclaims she is a feminist and is appalled by our shop. She then says she pities me for working at a place that is so degrading to women. She takes my bosses business card and walks away in a huff. I don't answer her and give her a blank stare. Sometimes no reaction is the best reaction. My mood altered by her. I am troubled by this interaction.
A couple walks in asking about almost every product in the store. I am in a bad mood due to "feminist" lady. But they are good natured and inquisitive. Doubt that they will buy anything, but at least it's positive company.
Sleazy guy with a runny nose comes to the counter, leans in and asks if we do more than sell stuff. When I talk to him about the classes we offer, he starts asking if it's a good place to meet hyper sexual people. When I tell him that the classes aren't really for picking up dates, he still pushes that he could meet someone there because "if she's there, she must be not as experienced, like me, right?" Way to try to pray on women who just want to learn. Bravo sir.
*sigh*
Guy in his forties walks around the shop after testing out silicone lube and touches almost every product. Thankfully he actually bought something, or I'd be pissed. His items were slippery as I put them in his bag. He then asked if we had any unmarked bag since one with our store logo was embarrassing.
Group of young 20 year olds run around the store as if it were Disneyland. They play and throw things around, causing a mess and don't purchase a thing.
Shabby looking old man walks in with a walking stick. Creeps other customers out.
Gentlemen walks in and has me describe every massage oil we carry. Didn't understand when I calmly explained multiple times that oil will stain sheets. He then opened every bottle to smell it and announced loudly what each smelled like. He left without buying anything, saying maybe he'd come back after coffee.
Woman walks in to complain about our advertisement outside (poster of a pin up girl). She proclaims she is a feminist and is appalled by our shop. She then says she pities me for working at a place that is so degrading to women. She takes my bosses business card and walks away in a huff. I don't answer her and give her a blank stare. Sometimes no reaction is the best reaction. My mood altered by her. I am troubled by this interaction.
A couple walks in asking about almost every product in the store. I am in a bad mood due to "feminist" lady. But they are good natured and inquisitive. Doubt that they will buy anything, but at least it's positive company.
Sleazy guy with a runny nose comes to the counter, leans in and asks if we do more than sell stuff. When I talk to him about the classes we offer, he starts asking if it's a good place to meet hyper sexual people. When I tell him that the classes aren't really for picking up dates, he still pushes that he could meet someone there because "if she's there, she must be not as experienced, like me, right?" Way to try to pray on women who just want to learn. Bravo sir.
*sigh*
So two cute old ladies walk into a sex shop...
Sounds like a beginning of a really good joke or a really disturbing porno. But really, this did happen to me last night.
Two elder ladies in cute sweaters and big glasses came into the store. At first I guessed they needed change for the parking meters (something that people tend to wander in our store for) or were lost or something. Once in a while I do get older folks in here, but it is pretty rare and they usually buy a Hitachi or something similar.
These women walked straight up the the counter and in the sweetest voice you can imagine asked politely, "Do you carry bongs?" I have to say, I almost fell off my seat. She explained that she collected them, talking as my own grandmother does about her beloved Frank Sinatra collectors items. When I directed her around the corner to the new smoke shop that opened up a few months ago, she kindly thanked me and wished me well in my business. She said she wished she could purchase something, but she hadn't had "those kind of needs" since 1993.
Two elder ladies in cute sweaters and big glasses came into the store. At first I guessed they needed change for the parking meters (something that people tend to wander in our store for) or were lost or something. Once in a while I do get older folks in here, but it is pretty rare and they usually buy a Hitachi or something similar.
These women walked straight up the the counter and in the sweetest voice you can imagine asked politely, "Do you carry bongs?" I have to say, I almost fell off my seat. She explained that she collected them, talking as my own grandmother does about her beloved Frank Sinatra collectors items. When I directed her around the corner to the new smoke shop that opened up a few months ago, she kindly thanked me and wished me well in my business. She said she wished she could purchase something, but she hadn't had "those kind of needs" since 1993.
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